


You Look Happier, You Do

by Aftersilence



Category: Figure Skating RPF
Genre: Because I'm still not over the Olympics, Kaitlyn's POV, Opening Ceremony, PyeongChang, Reflection
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-08
Updated: 2018-06-08
Packaged: 2019-05-19 14:10:05
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,638
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14875235
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Aftersilence/pseuds/Aftersilence
Summary: People would ask Kaitlyn, in the months and years to follow, how it was possible that she didn’t know. They will phrase it more politely than that, always well-meaning, but the intention was always the same:How could you not see that he belongs to her? He could never truly be yours.ORKaitlyn reflects on what she sees.





	You Look Happier, You Do

**Author's Note:**

> I get that this song (Happier, by Ed Sheeran) is blatantly T&S post-Sochi, but I had this one line stuck in my head for like two days (which is exactly as annoying as it sounds) and realised that on its own, that line is Kaitlyn seeing Scott post-comeback and realising how much better he is with T. Because let's be honest, literally every song could be related back to our favourite platonic business partners.

People would ask Kaitlyn, in the months and years to follow, how it was possible that she didn’t know. They will phrase it more politely than that, always well-meaning, but the intention was always the same: _How could you not see that he belongs to her? He could never truly be yours._

 

In her defence, at the time it wasn’t obvious. In the years to come, Tessa and Scott would talk in interviews about the dark times post-Sochi. To begin with, she felt a little hurt - their relationship started post-Sochi and to lump her into these supposed dark times felt a bit degrading. But time and distance allowed her to see that it wasn’t about her (It never was, really), that she might have been a salve but she was never stitches – cooling the wound but not enough to heal it. That’s not to say that she wasn’t unaware of what was going on with Scott at the time. She was conscious of not trying too hard to involve herself in something that she had no idea about, instead focusing on keeping things light, hoping that would be enough to keep him from getting too dark. And they had fun – for all Scott’s talk in interviews about his spiralling, they still had wonderful times. Hiking in Winnipeg, dinners in far-flung locations that they had driven to just for the sake of the drive, quiet mornings drinking coffee on the deck. A domesticity that she knew he had craved but never found before now.

If she couldn’t stop the spiral, she decided, she would try and find him moments of calm. And she did. Over time, Scott’s face smoothed out, the haunted look faded away and he became more of what her psychologist friend would refer to as an “active participant” in the world around him. She knew, though, that only one person could fix him properly and she was busy spiralling into her own madness. It might not have been the stereotypical dark spiral of booze and parties, but it didn’t take a genius to realise that Tessa Virtue was caught up in her own spiral of trying to forget what had happened – trying desperately to claw back some of the control that she was so dependent on, that had been lost somewhere between the GPF and the Olympics. 

“T writes her own narrative” Scott had said once, when Kaitlyn had brought up the amount of work Tessa was committing herself to, trying to show concern for someone that she had barely met, but was such a big part of her boyfriend’s life. 

His tone indicated that he didn’t want to talk about Tessa, and Kaitlyn didn’t push him. Maybe she should have. But they were barely speaking, and Kaitlyn had (perhaps naively) assumed that now that they had retired, that they were just getting on with the business of having their own lives.  
Maybe that’s what Tessa and Scott thought too. 

She had asked about their relationship only once – right when she and Scott had started getting serious and she had felt the twinge of unease about how committed he could possibly be to her. His response was abrupt, but honest enough that she was reassured that there was nothing going on with them (then, at least). Kaitlyn had wondered, even then, even when he was telling her that it was her he wanted to give his heart to, if he would ever be able to give his WHOLE heart. As time went on, she realised that he was giving her as much of himself as he could – and she was so smitten with him, this warm, funny, thoughtful, loving man, that it was enough. 

 

When they were in Scotland, she and Tessa finally got to bond. Scott was in a better place, he and Tessa were in a better place, and Tessa looked like she had finally taken a desperately needed vacation. 

Kaitlyn was unsurprised to find that she really liked Tessa. She could see what everyone else saw – the motivated, fiercely determined woman that had become a role model for so many young women – which on its own was enough to like her, but there was so much more. She had a gentleness that did come as a surprise to Kaitlyn, a nurturing side that had been kept so hidden from the world (but definitely not from Scott, given how attuned Tessa was to his moods). She was FUNNY too, and after an afternoon spent goofing off with her on the shore of the lake, Kaitlyn impulsively wrapped an arm around her and hugged her. Tessa immediately hugged her back but looked a little quizzically at her.  
“I’m so glad we’re hanging out,” was all Kaitlyn said, and Tessa smiled in understanding. 

“Me too.” 

 

By the end of the trip, when Tessa and Scott boarded a flight to China and she headed back to Canada, she had begun to wonder if they really were as done with competition as they claimed to be. She asked Scott about it, the night before they left. His hesitation answered her question. Later she would look back to that conversation, to try to work out if she should have seen the writing on the wall then, but can only remember feeling excited for him – he had so much left to give and the break without purpose had not done him any good. 

It was not the last honest conversation she would have with him in the middle of the night that month. 

 

After they split up, Kaitlyn didn’t see Scott again until they were in PyeongChang. She had followed his progress over the 2 years, naturally, because you don’t spend nearly two years of your life with someone without remaining interested in their successes. 

She had watched their competition routines with astonishment, recognising what so many others both in and outside of the figure skating world were seeing – these two were doing something incredible. The perfect twizzles in their short dance was movement so in-sync that it was suddenly overwhelmingly evident how long they had been skating together and their connection in their free dance was palpable even through a screen. It felt sometimes like she was intruding on something incredibly private, so overt was the emotion shining through. He had told her that they liked their programs to tell a story and she knew with an aching heart (aching not just for herself and the relationship that could never have been, but for THEM and the relationship they had run from for so long) that they had finally been honest with each other in a way she had always suspected that they had avoided for years. 

She had wanted to text him when he and Tessa were announced as the flagbearers, but hadn’t been sure if that was appropriate. She felt they had ended amicably, thankful for what they had been to each other, but she had no idea what he felt towards her now. 

So when she found herself standing near them in Canada House, waiting for the bus that would take the athletes to the stadium for the Opening Ceremony, she suddenly felt a little apprehensive despite her inner voice that said Don’t be ridiculous, you shared so much of your life with this person, go and talk to him. 

As it turned out, she didn’t need to – Tessa saw her before she could move, and nudged Scott to get his attention, smiling at Kaitlyn. Scott turned, saw her and beamed, bouncing over to her with the excited movement of an over-stimulated puppy dog. _He always thrived on the energy of big crowds_ she had time to reflect before he was in front of her, Tessa hovering a short distance away (still so polite, letting them say hello alone first). 

Kaitlyn hugged Scott as they exchanged greetings. 

“It’s so great to see you here Kait!” Scott almost had to yell over the noise of the mass of Team Canada athletes and she laughed, getting caught up in his happiness. 

“You guys too – and congratulations on being flag bearers! I was so happy for you when I heard!” She grinned at him and then across at Tessa, silently inviting her across. Tessa greeted her with the warm hug of an old friend and she was suddenly conscious of what it had taken to get them all here (and not just physically to PyeongChang).

“Thanks! It’s incredible, this whole thing…it’s just incredible! And insane!” Scott was laughing now, as though he suddenly couldn’t quite believe they were all there, either. 

“I was going to text you, but…” She trailed off, not wanting to yell about her insecurities (she had always prided herself on having very few, but this was different) in the crowd of noisy athletes, their ever-increasing number squeezing them closer together as everyone jostled for space in the lobby.

“You should have done! It would have been so nice to hear from you. How have you been?” 

She blinked because of COURSE he was this relaxed about seeing her, and he genuinely would have enjoyed hearing from her. 

“Yeah, I…I’m great.” And then, because she couldn’t help herself – because despite it not being her right to know she needed to know if it was worth it – she threw it back to him. “And you guys? You’re…good?” They both knew she wasn’t enquiring about their health. 

Scott glanced down at Tessa, who had ended up tucked under Scott’s arm in the melee and Tessa looked up at him. They smiled at each other, a look so intimate that it stole Kaitlyn’s breath for a second. 

“Yeah.” Scott said, so quietly (and yet Kaitlyn could hear him so clearly) and without taking his eyes off Tessa, who was still looking adoringly at him.  
  
“We’re amazing.”

**Author's Note:**

> I had a whole other ending for this, where T&S get dragged away by an official and Kaitlyn watches them walk away together, but I couldn't write past the current last line. Everything after it felt trite and forced. So, this is shorter than I would have liked (as usual). 
> 
> There is SO MUCH good fic in this fandom at the moment, we are truly spoiled. I am merely paddling in the shallow end of the writing pool. Having said that, I'd love to know what you think.


End file.
